Soulful Sunday

Welcome to Soulful Sunday.

This is a new concept. Instead of exposing my bare naked body, I will instead expose my soul.

Today I want to talk about the one thing in my life that I have never really had. A best friend.

For those of you who know me, you may know that I have many different sides. I can be funny, sarcastic, emotional, caring, angry, stubborn, etc. Most people see the happy Jen, the funny Jen and (hopefully) the caring Jen. Not very many people see the sad, depressed and extremely emotional Jen.

I am not afraid to be vulnerable around people. I am, however, afraid to tell people what is actually wrong.

I want a best friend. I envy people who have a best friend. It really upsets me that I do not have a best friend!!

I often wonder why I cannot keep a long lasting friendship (never-mind a long lasting relationship!!). Is there something wrong with me? Am I just too independent? Is it wrong for me to want to have someone who is guaranteed to be there for me no matter what time of day, or no matter what the situation? It makes me sad to think that in my darkest hours of need, the people who I consider friends do not actually come through for me as I would expect a best friend to. 

I see people who are the best of friends, do everything together, have an amazing connection and would do anything for each other. I know these friendships are very rare, but why? 

I hope that one day, I will meet someone who will understand me without having to be told. To want to be there for me no matter what and knows that I will be there for them too. 

If you have a best friend leave a comment and tell me about your friendship/connection. If you are like me and have never had a best friend let me know if this affects you in any way.

Much love

Jennifer x