Closing a chapter

I cannot believe how fast time went by since my last post. I got caught up in the excitement of free fruit at the festival that I forgot everything I had been doing.

Yin yoga went out the window as did meditation and in hindsight I think I could have been a better friend to the one who had taken ill and was in hospital.

Yesterday Chanthaburi was still buzzing with sugar junkies but today everyone left and it's been so quiet, but it's such a welcome relief. I really enjoyed being around people, but looking back at the last week I can honestly say I am glad to be returning home and not making the trip to Chiang Mai.

If there's one thing I've learned on my trip it's that I am very much still a loner, although I do appreciate having certain people in my life to talk to and be with. As with everything I must find balance.

I cried today because tomorrow I will leave Chanthaburi and head to Bangkok in preparation for my flight in 4 days, but I'll be leaving behind 2 amazing people who I met here last year. Mikkel and Mads have had a big impact on my life and it dawned on me that I've become attached to them, which is why I will find it difficult to say goodbye.

Out of everyone I've met on my travels, they're the most genuine, kind, caring, down to Earth, humble, grateful and intelligent people (I mean no offence to anyone else, you all are special to me, but these brothers are more so!). I enjoy being with them because they have a calming presence and I feel so comfortable in my own skin, I can be myself and I don't fear judgement from them.

However, I must break the attachment in order to grow as a spiritual being because it's the ego that has created it. I think I must grieve in order to continue moving forward. Deep down I know the work I do on myself will be worth it, but I often hesitate for fear of the unknown. I cover up my issues with obsessions, so I have never truly faced myself before.

When I return home I will close one chapter of my life and will open a new one, I hope that I can face myself and resolve the underlying issues once and for all.